My Recommended Language Studying Method

 I have heard an American joke that “the best way to study Japanese is by being born of Japanese parents in Japan and growing up in Japan.”

It sounds like a meaningless joke. But sometimes, a joke includes some truth. “Being born” and “growing up” are the best ways. However, we can try a second or a third way to study a foreign language.

Overseas study might be a good way. But it might be expensive. If you want to work in a country, you need a working visa. Furthermore, it might be a big decision. You have to say goodbye to your family and friends for a while. I studied overseas when I was young. It changed my life in many different ways.

 Having a boyfriend or a girlfriend who is a native speaker from the country is another good way. Actually, I have never experienced that. I heard that it is a very effective way to study a language. But if you already have a partner, you should give up on this study method. Studying should not disrupt your happy life.

 One-on-one lessons are also a good way to study. But they could be expensive. We have to pay a lot of money to good teachers.

 Taking a class is a good way at a reasonable price. If you loved classes in school when you were a student, you would also love taking a language class. If you hated school, I am not sure you would love a language class.

 The above ways are my recommended language studying methods. I, at least, have tried almost all these ways in my life. I am sure they are effective.

 The following method I actually tried too. I found it was also effective and fun.

 Repeatedly watching foreign TV dramas is my recommended language studying method.

 First, you should find a foreign drama series you like.

 You should watch that drama in the foreign language with no subtitles. You will find it difficult to understand the story. But if you are studying the language, you can guess the story. I think the most important key to studying a foreign language is guessing. If you are not a native speaker, it is impossible to fully understand all the lines in a drama. But you can guess.

 Second, watch the same drama with subtitles in the foreign language. The subtitles will help you understand the story. That process links pronunciation and letters. 

 Third, watch the same drama with subtitles in your mother tongue. I am sure you can now understand the full story. You will find places you misunderstood or had listening problems. The translators needed to make subtitles with fewer words. Sometimes they needed to omit the original lines. You will find some original content this way.

 Finally, watch the same drama dubbed in your mother tongue. This is the most fun option. You can fully enjoy the drama. I think the best translators and best voice actors cooperate in the drama. It might be an artistic masterpiece.

 I recommend this method to you because most of my readers are theatrical people. We practice the same story and the same scenes again and again. I think you will like this method.

 But I also have a warning for you. Watching a drama repeatedly is one of the effective ways to study a foreign language. But I also recommend other standard listening, writing, and speaking methods. This is just an additional way to study.

 Furthermore, this learning method has risks. In general, the conversations in a TV drama might happen in emergent situations. Or the conversation might be acceptable between people in a close relationship. You can’t use these words to people you meet in everyday situations. It could be rude.

 For example, the phrase “shut up” is very common in English dramas. But one of my American teachers said, “I have never said that phrase to my family nor my friends.”

 “Damare” means “shut up” in Japanese. Actually, I have never used that word in my life. But in TV dramas, the characters use the word very often.

 Reality and dramas are different. But still, the watching dramas method might be one way to enjoy studying a foreign language.

 If you are studying a foreign language, please try it.

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Ambidextrous

I am a right-hander.

But I was once in the hospital for a long time as a patient. And I needed to take care of my mother who had Alzheimer’s for a long time. I had a lot of time to kill. So, I tried to be a left-hander.

Now, I mainly use my left hand.

Every morning, I measure my grip strength for both my right and left hands. At first, my right hand was stronger, but my left hand gradually became stronger.

I kept using mainly my left hand for eight years. One day, my left hand was stronger than my right. I was surprised.

Now, when I measure my grip strength, my left hand wins once a week. When my left hand wins, I use my right hand that day.

My goal is for the strength of my right and left hands to become equal.

On TV, a professor said, “If a person mainly uses the opposite hand to their dominant hand, that might make the person a genius.”

I have never been a genius.

But if I had to eat a meal at a small table with many people, being ambidextrous would be useful.

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My no-fail joke

I have a no-fail joke. I’ve had it since I was a child.

It’s my sprinting. Whenever I sprint, everyone laughs at me.

I don’t sprint as a joke. I always sprint seriously. But everyone laughs.

When I was young, I was a part-time actor. I needed to sprint in a scene. The director scolded me many times because he assumed that I was kidding. Of course, I was not.

When I was in my final year of high school, we needed to time our runs in P.E. class. As usual, all of my classmates started to laugh when I sprinted, except one person. He was a member of the track and field team.

After the run, he came to me and said, “I couldn’t believe you could run that fast with such bad running form. I wish you had joined our track and field team and studied effective running form. You could have won a major competition for high school students.”　

My running form was a joke, but my time wasn’t so bad.

My hidden talent was found in my last year of high school. If I had known it before, I could have had a wonderful high school life. In reality, I was a member of the drama club. I lost the smallest competitions every year.

I wish I had joined the track and field team instead of the drama club.

What is done cannot be undone.

 

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Neighborhood Association

Are you in a neighborhood association? In Japan, in the old days, everyone joined such an association. However, these days, some people avoid joining one.

My wife and I are in a neighborhood association. Once, my parents did the neighborhood association’s tasks. When my mother contracted Alzheimer’s disease, she couldn’t do the tasks anymore. When I took over these tasks, I had to act as the leader of the association many times.

The neighborhood is an important system. If a disaster happens, we have to help one another. I know it is important, but the association’s tasks are too bothersome to perform in a peaceful world. Furthermore, I needed to take care of my mother and father; it was so difficult to be the leader of the association.

Some people in my neighborhood quit the association. The post of leader is turn-based. There were only a few members. My turn as the leader arrived too quickly.

One year, I became the leader of the association again. I thought this was bothersome. Then the pandemic started. The association skipped most of its events. I had almost no tasks as the leader of the association that year.

We all experienced tragedy during the pandemic, but at least my wife and I took a small break.

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Uirou-Uri’s Line

 

The most famous line in English theater might be “To be or not to be,” from Hamlet by Shakespeare. The most famous line in Japanese kabuki theater might be the line of uirou-uri from uirou-uri.

This line is famous because of its difficulty to recite. Most of the lines of uirou-uri are tongue twisters. So actors and announcers who are required to speak to their audiences recite this line for practice. Some of them memorize all the lines. Saying all the lines might take about six minutes.

I also studied this line when I was a high school student. I was a member of the drama club. Actually, I assumed the line was just a combination of tongue twisters, but this is not true. uirou-uri is one of the best eighteen stories in Kabuki theater. It has a full story, which I only recently learned.

The famous line is a speech by a medicine salesman. He explains that he is selling a wonderful kind of medicine, named uirou. He says that the medicine heals all kinds of illnesses—a cure-all. Furthermore, it has a side effect. If you take this medicine, you can recite any tongue twister easily. Then through a product demonstration, the salesman takes the medicine and recites several tongue twisters.

A half-witted samurai watches this demonstration and believes the salesman. He buys the medicine and takes it, but the samurai can’t recite the tongue twisters. He flubs the line many times. There is no such side effect from the medicine. The salesman simply practiced saying the tongue twisters many times. This is the comedy aspect of the show.

The salesman is actually a samurai. His father was also killed by a samurai. To avenge his father’s death and to determine the enemy’s identity, he disguised himself as a salesman and traveled for long time. Then he eventually finds his enemy. This is the story of uirou-uri.

Uirou-uri and Hamlet are both about sons avenging their fathers’ deaths. The most famous theater lines in the West and in the East are similar in this sense.

Interestingly, the medicine uirou really exists, even now, but we can’t buy it online or even in any drugstores in my town. Just one shop in Odawara City sells it, face-to-face. It is said that the shop has over five hundred years of history. They said that they have never sold their medicines via product demonstrations such as that in uirou-uri.

So it is a little complicated. uirou is an actual medicine, but the uirou salesman is a fictional job.

Wait! What are you doing? Are you still reading this document? I uploaded a video of myself reciting Uirou-Uri’s line. Please enjoy my attempt at saying a tongue twister.

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Smartwatch

Now, many people wear a smartwatch. I also wear one.

I believe I was one of the early users of smartwatches. A friend of mine wore one and recommended it to me. I liked it. I quickly ordered a smartwatch.

Smartwatches have developed nicely. But the old models were not so “smart.”

My smartwatch evaluates my sleep every day. Sleep is important for health. I started to care about my sleep. The smartwatch can share my sleep information with my family and friends. Actually, I don’t use that function. If you can share sleep information with close friends or family, it might be fun, though. But if you take a nap during work time and everyone knows that, it would be embarrassing.

Once, I went to a dental clinic for a regular checkup. After the checkup, a dental hygienist removed tartar from my teeth. I hated that. It was a very unpleasant experience. The machine was noisy. I couldn’t move during the treatment. It took almost one hour.

After that, I bought a soft drink. I had a small celebration party by myself. The next checkup was six months later. I didn’t need to go to a dentist for six months, as I didn’t have any tooth problems. What a relief!

Then, I checked my smartwatch, which linked to my smartphone. I was shocked. My smartwatch recognized that one hour as a nap. I didn’t sleep! Who can sleep while having tartar removed? Am I a big shot? Was the smartwatch really “smart”?

I recommend smartwatches to you. New smartwatch models never make this kind of mistake anymore.

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Towels

My mother used to fold towels into three for storage. That was our family style. I assumed everyone folded towels into three.

When my mother had Alzheimer’s disease, helpers started to come to her house. They did many tasks, such as laundry. Then, I realized most people fold towels into four. I didn’t have any reason to tell them about our family style. I adopted their style and started to fold towels into four.

But at my house, I kept our family tradition. My wife I and folded towels into three.

My mother has since passed away. And I found my wife now tends to fold towels into four. At my wife’s parents house, they fold towels into four. She had adopted my style before. I fold towels into three; my wife folds them into four. That is not efficient. Differently folded towels are not good for storage.

From now on, I will fold towels into four.

Goodbye, Mommy.

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Acting Being Upset

　I am a smoker. I know that is a bad habit. I want to quit someday.

I use an e-cigarette. To smoke an e-cigarette, I don’t need a lighter. Still, I always carry a lighter. I think I need a lighter in certain situations. Up to now, I have used it just once. When I experienced a blackout, the lighter was useful.

In the old days, many people were smokers. We could see many people smoking on TV. At that time, the typical way of acting being upset with a cigarette was the smoker trying to light the wrong end of the cigarette. The person had the cigarette the wrong way round because they were so upset. “Why can’t I light the cigarette? Oh! It was the wrong way round.” That was a classic line.

A few years ago, I was upset.

I hid the fact that I was upset and went away from the other people. Then, I tried to smoke to calm down. “Why can’t I light the cigarette? Oh!”

Actually, I was trying to light my e-cigarette with the lighter. It might have been dangerous.

I was very upset.

Is this scene possible on TV? A character is so upset that they try to light an e-cigarette with a lighter?

No, most people don’t smoke these days. I think it is realistic, but it doesn’t work.

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Asking the Way in Tokyo

Now, we have smartphones. When I lose my way, my smartphone tells me which direction to go in.

But a few decades ago, no one had a smartphone. When I lost my way, I used to ask other people for directions.

In 2001, I had lived in Tokyo for a year. I was still a stranger in Tokyo. I lost my way many times. I asked many people for directions. But strange things happened.

When I tried to communicate with someone on the street, the person became nervous and ran away from me. They didn’t even reply. I tried to ask more politely, but it didn’t work. At first, I thought people in Tokyo were busy or people in cities were cold. But it didn’t take long to find out why they acted like that.

At that time, if a stranger tried to communicate with you on a street, in most cases, it was a scam. A confidence trick. The Japanese term is “catch sales.” The scammers caught their targets on streets and committed fraud. The scammers wore nice clothes and talked very politely. But they tried to sell expensive goods. They tried to make unfair contracts. In some cases, they tried to invite you to antisocial cults. Actually, once, I talked with and followed one of those scammers and had a scary experience.

So, at that time, in Tokyo, if a stranger said hello to you on a street, running away from the person was the correct response.

But still, I needed to ask the way from people on the street. Then, I finally found out the best way to ask the way in Tokyo.

I realized I should not get too close to a person. I should ask them in a loud voice with few words, like a childishly rude person: “Where is the station?”

Most of the people in Tokyo were nice and understood the situation. So, they replied like a childishly rude person too: “Go straight, and then turn right at the end.”

Politeness is not always the best way.

Because of those scams, people who really needed to talk to others on the street, like me, had a lot of trouble. I hate scams.

These days, in Japan, many people experience international romance scams on social media. People who are attractive but unnatural send messages to me every day. Somehow, in many cases, they insist they are soldiers. Is a soldier an internationally attractive job? But real soldiers might have a lot of problems. If a real soldier sends a message to a stranger, the stranger will suspect it might be a scam.

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Clapping

              I used to be a part-time stage actor. I was onstage in mini-theaters. So, I know that most of the actors in mini-theaters don’t get paid a performance fee. They only get applause from the audience of the show. So, I wanted to clap strongly and loudly when I went to theaters as a member of the audience. But I couldn’t. I was not a good clapper. My hands couldn’t make a loud sound, and I couldn’t clap for a long time. If I kept clapping for a long time, my hands were painful. I always wanted be a good clapper.

              By the way, I was not a religious person, because my parents were not religious people. So, our house didn’t have any family altar.

             When my father passed away, I decided to have an altar in our home. I also started to pray in front of the altar every morning.

              Praying in the traditional Japanese Shinto way is by bowing twice, clapping the hands twice, and then bowing again.

              People who are more religious than me do this every morning and evening. I am not that religious, so I just did it every morning.

              About eight years later, I found out my clapping had changed. I had become a good clapper. I never felt pain, even if I clapped for a long time. My clapping had become louder. If I clap as powerfully as I can, other members of the audience would be surprised and look at me. 

              I clap twice every morning. In this way, I practiced clapping for eight years. It made me a good clapper.

              I think this practice method can be used in other fields.

              When we want to master something, we tend to practice very hard. We could practice from morning to night every day. But in most cases, this would make us tired. In most cases, we would quit. This is why most of us are quitters.

              If you want to master something, practice twice every morning. Practice sincerely, like praying. If you have more passion, you can practice every evening too. If you continue this practice style, you can master anything in a few years.

              The Shinto praying style may contain a hidden message from the ancient Japanese.

              There must be many things we should learn from ancient peoples.

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Actor-Horse

 

              My wife and I visited a stock farm to take a picture with a horse because that year was the year of the horse. Taking a picture with a horse might have brought us good luck.

              We experienced horseback riding and took some pictures.

             I had the opportunity to talk with the owner of the farm. I asked him the question I had always wanted ask: “I have seen many movies and TV dramas related to horses. In them, there are sometimes scenes in which horses fall down. How do they film those scenes?”

              I imagined that the answer might be scary. If a horse falls down in a horse race, that could kill the horse. I prepared myself to hear a scary answer.

He answered: “Some horses can act like that.”

             What a relief. Those horses were different from racing horses, which need to run at top speed. Dogs and monkeys can trick people. Of course, horses can trick people too. They are actor-horses.

              But on TV, movie director Takeshi Kitano said a scary thing: “In the old days, they used stun guns to make horses fall down, but now we cannot do that, because of animal rights.”

             Falling-down scenes used to be scary. I can’t watch old horse movies anymore.

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A Question from A Student

I lived with my mother for fourteen years when she had Alzheimer’s disease. I published a book about the experience. A university invited me to be a guest teacher because of the book.

When I was a student, universities were very crowded. I was worried that I would need to talk in front of hundreds of students. Actually, there were only six students in front of me—because of the declining birth rate in Japan, I guess.

I decided not to give them a speech but to have a round-table discussion.

I briefly introduced myself and my book, then asked: “Do you have any questions?”

The first question was, “Why did you decide to care for your mother?”

That was not the question I expected. I couldn’t answer for a while.

I never decided to take care of my mother, not intentionally. I lived with my parents, and my mother happened to become an Alzheimer’s patient. At that time, my mother had many friends. They visited our house every day. I assumed they would take part in caregiving for my mother, but they didn’t. I assumed government welfare offices and hospitals would take care of my mother, but they never actively helped us. The caregiver needed to make the first move.

I never wanted to take care of my mother in my life. Everyone dumped the caregiving on me and ran away. No one would take care of her except me. I didn’t have the courage to dump my mother, and I never did.

I couldn’t answer the student’s question then, but I can now.

“In the future, I wish only people who wanted to decide to become caregivers.”

 

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Miserable

If Alzheimer’s disease progresses naturally, the patient will eventually lose the ability to walk, and the caregivers will need to use a wheelchair to move the patient. Finally, the patient becomes bedridden. If the patient and caregivers are lucky and the caregivers do the best they can, the process may not be so bad.

This is not always the case. Some patients wander around. In some cases, they get lost and never come back. Some have accidents and pass away. Alzheimer’s patients may have other diseases, and some die because of them.

My mother had Alzheimer’s disease. First, she needed a wheelchair, and then she became bedridden. Finally, she stopped breathing and passed away. It took about twenty years. Many people helped us. We were all lucky. I did as much caregiving as I could.

My mother and I commuted to a hospital that specialized in dementia. There were many Alzheimer’s patients in the waiting room who were in different stages of the disease.

While my mother could walk by herself, I saw patients who needed to use wheelchairs. I thought that was miserable. I imagined it took caregivers a huge effort to take care of them.

About ten years later, my mother also needed to use a wheelchair. When I visited the same hospital, I saw Alzheimer’s patients who could walk by themselves, and I thought completely the opposite: “Oh, that patient can walk by themselves. It must take the caregivers a huge effort to keep the patient safe. It must be miserable.”

According to a book, the early stage is the most difficult when taking care of a person with Alzheimer’s disease. Caregiving will gradually become easier as the disease progresses. From a caregiver’s point of view, a bedridden patient is the easiest to deal with.

I remember feeling relieved when my mother lost the ability to walk. It meant I didn’t need to watch her all the time. If we used a wheelchair, I could move at my own pace. It was hard to help her when she was still tottering. I needed to look out for small bumps and steps.

If your loved one has Alzheimer’s disease, it is miserable, but how miserable you are cannot be judged by surface appearances. Those caring for people in the early stages of Alzheimer’s disease experience the hardest life. They and their elderly relatives might look normal. We can’t know who is miserable from their appearance.

 

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Medicine for Alzheimer ‘s disease

　I once cared for two Alzheimer’s disease patients, my mother and my great aunt. I had hard days at that time. Taking care of Alzheimer’s patients at home is difficult -- almost impossible. It hurts to remember those days, even now.

 One day, I saw to a big newspaper advertisement about a medicine. It said the medicine was effective for Alzheimer’s disease. At that time, there was just one Alzheimer’s medicine, Aricept, covered by the Japanese insurance system. My mother and my great aunt were taking Aricept, but the advertisement said this new medicine would be good for the disease.

 It cost 150 dollars per month. If I bought it for my mother and my great aunt, I’d have to pay 300 dollars every month. Expensive! But if that medicine helped our hard situation, it would be priceless.

 Before I decided to buy the medicine, I talked to our doctor about it. He didn’t know about the medicine. He said he was not sure if it was effective or not.

 I was suspicious, and we could not afford the medicine. I gave up on buying it.

 A few years later, I found a small article in the same newspaper. Scientists had discovered that the medicine had no effect on Alzheimer’s disease. It was a fake medicine!

 It was so close. I almost had paid for this fraud! If I had paid 300 dollars every month, it would be 3,600 dollars every year! The caregivers for Alzheimer’s disease patients are vulnerable. They are all struggling. A drowning man will clutch at a straw. The company took advantage of their weakness. I can’t forgive them.

 I also can’t forgive the newspaper company. They put the advertisement in the paper. Many people were fooled by the advertisement. Then, the newspaper company published only a very small article to explain that the medicine did not work. It was too late and too small.

 These days, false advertisement on social media is a hot topic. But even now, there may be false advertisement in the mass media. All media loves sponsors, because everyone loves money.

 Trust nobody!

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Don’t Lump

 When I visited the USA by myself for the first time, I stayed at a B&B. It was economic and also introduced me to a roommate.

 My first roommate was an older Swedish man. I am not familiar with Sweden, but I remembered that I had learned at university that Sweden and Denmark were good at social welfare. I mentioned that as a compliment, but he was not happy to hear it. He said, “Don’t lump Swede and Denmark.”

 When I lived in Osaka, I visited Sakai, which is located next to Osaka. I am from Nagoya. It is different part of Japan. I mentioned differences between Osaka and Nagoya to a person in Sakai.

 He was not happy to hear that. He said, “Don’t lump Sakai and Osaka.”

 Generally, neighbors are similar. But in most cases, they don’t want to be lumped.

 I have an elder brother. His face and voice are similar to mine. But if someone said we had similar personalities, I would be not happy. I would say, “Don’t lump me and my elder brother.”

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“Games and Money”

 

I used to work as a scriptwriter at a video game company.

 

I love games even now. I still play and enjoy them as a user.

 

I never did any great work in the game industry. But sometimes I get concerned about games these days.

 

I get concerned about the billing.

 

When I was a game creator, there was no on-line shopping or in-app billing.

 

People used to buy video games at game shops. If we bought a game, we paid money at the shop. We would buy the whole game. The billing would happen just once.

 

That was simple. But there were bad companies. They spent most of their budget on the designs of the boxes. They hired a good designer and copywriter. They sold good-looking packages. Many people loved the looks and bought them. But the contents were shabby. Those companies made a lot of profit in those days.

 

Don’t judge a game by its appearance.

 

Samurais need chivalry. Merchants need chivalry. Game creators also need chivalry.

 

Now those companies can’t continue such business. People can check the reviews of the games online.

 

These days, billing systems have changed. Smartphone games are basically free. Game creators need money to live. So, naturally, they should ask the users to pay. The point I am impressed by is the timing they choose to ask to be paid. If a user pays, then the user can enjoy more of the game. Most of the games are really good at creating situations that make the user want to pay. The creators are good at choosing when to ask the user to pay. They are too good. Some children spend too much of their parents’ money on such games. It is almost dangerous.

 

Once I played a smartphone game. In the game, users run a farm and go on adventures. The user would grow crops and feed animals. Sometimes, they would explore the world. I had played the game for a few weeks. But I couldn’t find a way to get food for the animals. They were hungry. Then I finally found out that I needed to pay a fee to feed the animals. I was outraged. The animals couldn’t die because of hunger. But they kept asking for food because they were hungry. Could I go on an adventure to address this situation?

 

If a child plays that game, he or her could grow up as an adult who doesn’t care about other people’s pain. The game creators undermined people’s good nature.

 

Samurais need chivalry. Merchants need chivalry. Game creators also need chivalry.

 

I quit the game. We should not forget to have a conscience in any of our dealings.

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“Clapping”

My wife’s sister is working as a nurse in London.

 

When the pandemic started, my sister-in-law cared for the first Covid-19 patient at her hospital. The hospital had few PPEs. The PPEs were all the same size. They perfectly matched her.

 

Then she moved to a hospital that specialized in Covid-19. She was on the front line during the pandemic. I think she was a hero.

 

On TV, I heard that people at the hospitals for Covid-19 in the UK would welcome commuting medical workers by clapping. I was impressed by this story. At the time, in Japan, medical workers’ children were being abused at school. I thought this reflected a negative side of Japan.

 

My sister-in-law and I talked about the topic. I assumed she would be proud of the actions of the people in the UK. But, instead, she said, “I hated that.”

 

She is a very shy person. She hates to have attention be paid to her. She hates to have people clap for her. Most of my readers are theatrical artists. So, most of us can’t understand this feeling. There are some people in the world who don’t like to be clapped for.

 

She said she was simply doing her job. She was just commuting to her workplace.

 

This did not deserve to be clapped for.

 

She had worked on the front line during the pandemic. She didn’t get infected at her workplace. I think she is a really great nurse.

 

A few years later, Covid-19 infections became common occurrences.

 

She got infected at a family party. Of course, nurses are normal people in their private lives.

 

I learned that there are some people who hate to have people clap for them. But I still want to clap for great workers. Is this because I am a theatrical person?

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Slapping Acting

              I was a member of a drama club when I was a high school student. Sometimes, drama clubs from different schools gathered for conferences, and we had comment workshops. I was a member of one such workshop. Some local theater people attended as advisors. We discussed the performances of each drama club, and one performance gave us a very difficult topic.

              In one scene, an actor slapped another, hitting the other actor’s face pretty hard. Most of the audience was surprised but enjoyed the scene; teenagers love aggression. However, this created a major issue for the comment workshop, which had two adult theater artists. Their opinions were completely opposite.

              One artist criticized the scene, saying we should not allow violence in any situation. Actors need to learn to pretend to slap. If someone got injured on the stage, they might be unable to continue their performance.

              The other artist appraised the scene and said that reality is important. If actors practiced enough, serious accidents would never happen.

              The two artists argued for a very long time. They almost forgot that this was a workshop for high school students. We were surprised to hear a serious argument between adults.

              This is a controversial topic in acting worldwide. People have never reached a consensus about this. In my opinion, if the actors and director have a relationship of mutual trust and enough time to practice, it might be OK. But I feel slapping someone on stage is kind of an old custom. Audiences might not want to watch that sort of scene these days.

              Kiyosi Atumi is one of the greatest actors in Japanese history. In his main work, “It’s Tough Being a Man,” he described a scene in which he slapped an actress’s face. The director asked him to actually slap her. I think he was reluctant to do that. As a result, he slapped her face very softly. It was almost touching. This could be a possible solution.

 

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Picture by VECTORIUM

Slight Bow

 

              When the pandemic started, some companies closed their buildings in Japan. The employees then gathered in small groups at karaoke clubs and tried to continue their jobs.

              At that time, I visited a karaoke club to enjoy karaoke. In a normal situation, there would be drunks, students, and elderly people in karaoke clubs. Most of them would be relaxed. But during the pandemic, most people in karaoke clubs were in working mode.

              Most Japanese karaoke clubs have designated smoking and non-smoking areas. At the karaoke club I visited, there was a common smoking room. No one could smoke except in the room. Of course, no one could do karaoke there, but it used to be a karaoke room.

              While I was smoking, a worker entered the smoking room. She bowed slightly to me and started smoking. Nobody had ever bowed to me in a karaoke club’s smoking room before. I guess she assumed I was not there to listen to karaoke but an important person at her company whom she didn’t know.

              Naturally, I bowed back to her. She might have been an important person trying to work during the pandemic.

 

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Picture by shrimpgraphic

 

Sharp Ears

Getting old might involve losing one’s faculties. My father was hard of hearing when he was old. On the other hand, my mother had good hearing, but she had Alzheimer’s disease.

Caregiving for an Alzheimer’s patient is very hard. It is especially hard when the patient and caregiver live together. Most caregivers don’t last beyond a few months. I had taken care of my mother for fourteen years. Of course it was not all happy days. Disputes were a part of caregiving.

One day, I was tired of my mother’s aimless talking, I climbed to the second floor and entered my room. And I said to myself, “Give it a rest!” Then my mother screamed from the ground floor, “What do you mean, ‘Give it a rest’?”

At least she had sharp ears.

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Picture by K.Nakano

Dishwashing Liquid

One day, when I was a kindergartener, a teacher said to us, “We will play at the pool tomorrow. You can bring your water gun.” 

I didn’t have a water gun, so I asked my mother to buy one. But she had another idea: “If you have an empty dishwashing liquid bottle, you can use it as a water gun.” 

The next day, everyone except me came with a water gun. I brought an empty dishwashing liquid bottle. 

There were fatal differences between the water guns and the bottle, for instance, their ranges. The bottle pushed water out over a very short range. The water guns launched water over a very long range. I was no match for the other kids. This is one of my bitter memories.

After that day, the teacher said that none of us would ever bring water guns again. We played at the pool without water guns. I didn’t know why. But now I wonder if it was because of us.

Perhaps the teachers saw a miserable child playing with a bottle instead of a water gun. They might have thought, “He must be from an economically poor family. His parents can’t afford a water gun. We have treated him unkindly. From now on, we will never use water guns.”

If that was the case, they were wrong. I am actually from a relatively rich family. My mother was a busy woman. She was an ideas woman too. She had no time to buy a water gun, so she came up with that idea. 

If that was what happened, I apologize to the teachers and kindergarteners. They had a pool, but for safety reasons, they couldn’t fill it with enough water. They could have only enough water to wet their toes. No one could swim in the pool. So asking the children to bring water guns was a nice way of letting them play safely. Without the water guns, the shallow pool was useless.

If you have little children, give them water guns.

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Picture by Kobito

Troll

In 1998, I was a student in California. At that time, free email accounts were highly accessible. Most people started having email accounts. People started to buy things online through Amazon.

In 1999, I returned to Japan. Most people didn’t have email accounts. Most people didn’t even know about Amazon. It took a few years for these same changes to occur in Japan. If something happened in the United States, the same thing would happen in Japan a few years later.

I met an American in Japan, and we become friends on Facebook. In 2016, those living in the United States had their presidential elections. This friend posted a short comment about the elections on Facebook. Immediately, an anonymous person posted objections to him. These objections were long passages. I was surprised by this anonymous person’s typing speed. I understood later that this was because of the “copy and paste” function.

I soon learned from a Japanese news program that this was a “political troll.” These elections were changing the United States. I thought that the same thing would happen in Japan in a few years.

In 2024, during a special election, a party obstructed a rival candidate’s speech on the streets. Tsubasa no To used a microphone and screamed negative comments in the middle of this candidate’s speech. We can call them “trolls,” but this was not online. It was not too primitive an incident either.

I would assume that Japan is a highly developed society with large advances in technology. Whenever something happens in the United States, the same thing would happen in Japan a few years later—but not necessarily in the same form.

Picture by Tuneyuki Kanata

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Diagnosis

The symptoms of Alzheimer’s disease hardly appear at the beginning. At the early stages, patients of this disease make the same mistakes as healthy people often do. In the case of Alzheimer’s disease, these mistakes gradually increase. In such a case, even a medical specialist can’t diagnose it decisively. It is simply difficult, and diagnosing a person with Alzheimer’s disease has a major effect on the patient and the people involved. In my mother’s case, most doctors avoided diagnosing her with Alzheimer’s disease. I felt that people began to say she had had the problem for a while —her trading partners, her coworkers, her friends, and her secretary, in that order.

I lived with my mother, but I hadn’t suspected that she had Alzheimer’s disease. She had always been a forgetful person since I was a child. At that time, we were tired because we needed to cover my grandmother’s caregiving. So I had assumed that my mother was simply tired. I observed that her forgetfulness increased but thought that this might be temporary.

That could be normalcy bias. People tend toward normalcy bias during disasters. When a disaster happens, some people often think, “This is still okay” or “ I will be okay” or “This time, it will be okay.” Then when it’s too late, these people can’t react correctly or can’t escape the situation. This mentality might even increase the damage of the disaster.

We met many doctors. It took about three years for us to find a doctor who diagnosed my mother with Alzheimer’s disease. I was surprised, but I still took an optimistic view of the situation. Back then, I didn’t have enough knowledge about Alzheimer’s disease. I believed I could continue my teaching job and acting on stage, but I needed to quit both a few years later.

One can say I lost a chance to escape from my mother’s Alzheimer’s disease. My mother had a lot of friends, and I had an elder brother. I had assumed they would help us, but actually, no one helped us. They had already escaped from us. Most of them even ignored us.

I missed the chance to escape this situation, but I fought my mother’s Alzheimer’s disease for over twenty years with my mother. I let her live out the rest of her natural life.

Sometimes I regret those twenty years—I wish I escaped like other people had—but I look on the bright side. At least I know who really cared about my mother. My mother’s address book has the names of over 1,500 people, but only about ten people worried about my mother and constantly contacted me. I will treasure these people for as long as I can.

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Picture by Taeko