A Picture for a Funeral

 　　　I used to live with my paternal grandmother. When she passed away, my mother was in trouble. She could not find any picture of my grandmother for the funeral. My mother and my grandmother hadn’t built a good relationship. Then my mother hadn’t taken her picture at all—but a funeral needs a picture.

After my paternal grandmother passed away, we started living with my maternal grandmother. My mother, having learned from her experience with my paternal grandmother, took my maternal grandmother’s picture all the time. My grandmother hated that. I agreed with her. It was almost like saying, “Your death is almost here. I am taking your picture because I will use it for your funeral.” It was not nice to do that to an old person.

My maternal grandmother lived a long life. She passed away when she was ninety-six years old. Unfortunately, my mother had already been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. So all the procedures related to my grandmother’s death fell to me. The undertaker asked me for a picture of my grandmother. I picked one of her pictures, which was an okay picture.

After the funeral, I needed to clean up my grandmother’s room. There, I found something shocking. I found two pictures of my grandmother for her funeral. They had already been stretched and framed. Why two pictures? Because she wore a Western-style dress in one picture and a Japanese traditional-style dress in the other picture.

These were beautiful pictures. I am sure these were taken by a professional photographer at a photo studio. My grandmother had prepared these by herself. I am sure my grandmother had talked about these pictures with my mother.

A long life might be nice. We can have enough time to prepare for our deaths. However, in my grandmother’s case, she was unlucky. She had prepared beautiful pictures for her funeral, but her only child, my mother, had Alzheimer’s disease before her death. My mother forgot about the pictures and kept taking pictures of my grandmother. My grandmother hated having her pictures taken by my mother. It makes sense.

We don’t know when we will die, but we can prepare nice pictures for special occasions at any time. I suggest an annual photo event for families. Once a year, all family members should wear their best clothes and sport their best hairstyles. Then everyone should visit a photo studio, where a professional photographer can shoot the best pictures of them. This might help make the best pictures for a funeral.

If you don’t have a funeral, you are lucky! These pictures might contain the best memory of you.

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Picture by Sue Hoshino

The Disadvantage of a Slim Body

I have always had weight problems. I have been on a diet for most of my life. Sometimes I can lose tons of weight and become a slim person. Sometimes I can gain tons of weight and become a fat person!

When I was a slim person, I could move lightly. I think I was a good-looking person. I wish I could keep my body slim. However, there is a big disadvantage to a slim body. When I had a slim body, people tended to sit next to me on trains or at theaters.

You know what? When I was a fat person, people avoided sitting down next to me. Thanks to this, I could enjoy almost three seats and relax! However, when I was skinny, people often sat down next to me. I am not tall. I was a small, skinny guy. Their first choice was always next to me!

Actually, I would make the same decision. When the venue starts to become crowded and if I have to sit down next to someone, I would try to find the smallest and skinniest person. I realize this because I have experienced being both a slim person and a fat person.

Dear friends, if you are on a diet now, don’t be on that too much. You will lose the privilege of enjoying almost three seats and relaxing!

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Picture by bee

Mysterious Café

 

It was over thirty years ago. One day I visited a café. I ordered a cup of coffee. In the café, there were no other visitors. There was just one waitress. I was the only visitor there, as if the café had been reserved by me. The waitress then brought me curry and rice.

I should have said, “Excuse me. I ordered coffee, not curry and rice,” but I couldn’t because I smelled the curry and felt hungry.

I didn’t say anything. I silently ate the curry and rice. The waitress didn’t say anything either.

I wondered about the payment. I checked the check. It read, “Coffee — $3.” I brought the check to the checkout counter. The waitress asked me for $4. The curry and rice were $7.

Was I lucky or unlucky? I had just paid $4 for curry and rice. Maybe I was lucky. However, I had paid $4 but couldn’t drink a cup of coffee. Maybe I was unlucky too. Still, if someone brings you curry and rice, you wouldn’t resist eating it.

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Picture by Minoru Mizuno

 

Younger Teachers

 

When I was a graduate student, my professor had asked me to teach him how to use a computer. That was in the 1990s. Personal computers had spread rapidly in Japanese society. My professor’s major was Western classical studies, but he was interested in computers. I taught him how to use a computer at the university. To start, I turned on a computer and showed him the icons of different software.

Then I said, “Please click this icon with your mouse.”

My professor physically lifted up the mouse and clicked the icon on the computer monitor directly. This is true! He was one of the authorities of Western classical studies in Japan. He had predicted the future! Still, we didn’t have touchscreen technology at that time. I bit back laughter desperately, but this is not a laughing matter.

Almost thirty years have passed. I have aged. If I want to study something now, in most cases, my teachers might be younger than me. If I hesitate to learn from young teachers, I can’t study anything. Now I need to follow my professor’s example. I have to learn from young teachers. Asking makes one appear foolish, but not asking also makes one foolish indeed.

Now I am studying English, Chinese, and computer technology. All of my teachers are younger than me. When I had a younger teacher for the first time, I felt strange, but now I get used to young teachers.

Still, sometime, I imagine, I might make a stupid mistake like my professor did. Then these young teachers might have to bite back their laugher desperately. We learn through mistakes for a lifetime.

 

Baby’s memory

 

I read an interesting post on social media.

The poster’s older brother was a unique person. He still had memories from when he was a baby.

The poster has a baby. Babies cry very often. They cry when they are hungry and when they wet themselves. Sometimes babies cry for no reason. The poster’s baby cried so often without any reason. So, she asked her brother, “Do you remember why you cried when you were a baby?”

Her brother answered, “In my case, on most occasions, I had an itch on my head. We can’t scratch our own heads when we are babies, right?”

Now, the poster pats her baby’s head with a wet towel softly when the baby cries for no reason. Sometimes the baby stops crying.

Sometimes, adults pat small children on the head to comfort them. Most children love that. It might be because of the memories they have of being unable to scratch their heads by themselves when they were babies.

If this story is true, we all had the same problem when we were babies. But most of us forgot about it.

Humankind is cute.

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Picture by nagi

Period of Popularity

Moteki is relatively a new Japanese word. Some people talk about and believe that “everyone has at least one short period of life when one enjoys more romantic attention than usual.” That is moteki.

If those people are right, I had such a period of life when I was a kindergartener.

One day, when I was a kindergartner, a girl gave me a paper. It wasn’t a letter. Most kindergartners can’t write letters. Instead, it was a strange picture. I assumed it was a kind of colored paper, and I kept it in my treasure box.

A few days later, someone called our house. Then, my mother severely scolded me.

The paper I had been given was not colored paper. It was paper money. I can’t remember exactly how much it was worth. But I think it might have been a lot. I didn’t understand the situation, but I gave the money to my mother. I think she returned the money to the female kindergartener’s parents with an apology.

That was on Valentine’s Day.

On Valentine’s day it is a Japanese custom for some women to give chocolates to men they love.

The female kindergartner wanted to give me chocolate, but she didn’t know where she could buy it because our town is kind of rural. So, she decided to give me cash instead. Of course, she stole the cash from her parents.

That was my moteki. I was almost a bad male companion who gets female customers to steal money and exploits them.

Now, bad male companions are a social problem in Japan. These male companions take a lot of money from young female guests. Some female guests steal money to give the companions.

I did this half a century ago.

I have never experienced such a moteki again. I have never been given cash by other girls.

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Lost in an RPG

It is possible to say that I am part of the first generation of video gamers. When I was in the second grade of elementary school, Japan experienced the arcade game boom. We spent almost $1 just to play one video game. Young people might laugh about that, but at the time, we spent so much money.

Arcade games transformed PC games and home game consoles. When I was in my twenties, I stayed up all night for a few days in a row to play PC games. Young people might also laugh about that. I was almost addicted to video games.

Now I believe that I and video games have built a good relationship. I am not crazy about video games. On the contrary, I have discontinued many games. I can’t finish many role-playing games (RPGs). For several reasons, I quit many games for a few months or years.

Sometimes I thought, “I want to clear a certain video game and watch the ending scene because I spent money on that game.” Then I continued an RPG, but I couldn’t remember who I was and where I was. An NPC speak to me in a friendly manner, but I couldn’t remember who they were. Did I have any special abilities? Then I just walked around, but I walked in circles. When I wanted to recover, I couldn’t return to the recovery spot. Then I would die. I couldn’t remember anything. It is possible to think that Alzheimer’s disease might be like this.

I also replayed a major game company’s game. It always let me know the story so far when I played the game. When I had played the game every day, I thought it was annoying, but whenever I resumed playing after a long break, this helped me a lot.

When we talk to an Alzheimer’s disease patient, we should talk about the story so far again and again with patience.

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Picture by Mogutani