Sutra

 

              In a common Japanese funeral, a monk chant is a sutra. These sutras are difficult to understand for ordinary Japanese people. I couldn’t understand why people were doing this. In these important moments, why do we have to listen to sutras when no one understands their meaning?

              In 2007, my grandmother who had lived with me passed away. My mother was the only child. She was the chief mourner, but she was already experiencing an onset of Alzheimer’s disease. I needed to play the role of the actual chief mourner.

              That was my first time to be a chief mourner. Everything was new to me. Furthermore, two of my relatives had trouble. It was possible that they would fight during the funeral. Their problems were so serious. If they started a fight during the funeral, it would lead to the humiliation of my grandmother. She had lived a great life and deserved a solemn funeral.

              I prepared for the funeral as the chief mourner. I also talked to both of my relatives. I asked them not to fight during the funeral. On the day of the funeral, these relatives always glared at each other. I was literally standing between them. I glared back at each of them. I was screaming in my mind, “If you start a fight now, I will never forgive you!”

              Then the monk started the sutra. I finally reached this moment. I believed the two relatives were not outraged as to who would start a fight during the sutra. I was released in this moment. During the sutra, I didn’t need to do anything. I didn’t need to think about anything. Then teardrops fell from my eyes. That was the first time I cried my eyes out after my grandmother had passed away.

              Primarily, a funeral is supposed to be a moment for sadness. I had no idea what the monk was saying, but I believe a funeral requires a moment like this. Sometimes a funeral could be a battlefield. I think monks don’t like this idea, but I think a sutra could be a nice interval.

Picture by Romi Harashi